Ugh some people have some nerve!

RenaBella · Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 3:36 pm Post subject: Ugh some people have some nerve!

My dog Timbit, who I wrote about in the other forum, died 3 weeks ago this Friday. He was epileptic, and his seizures were getting worse and worse and finally his poor body just gave up on him.
It was incredibly hard on me and words cannot describe how devastated I was. He was my baby boy and I truly felt like I lost a part of myself.

After a couple of days of just crying all day long, I started looking at new dog breeds and I can honestly said that if I didn't put all my energy into looking at the possibly of a new puppy, I would just be crying. Because my dog was always waiting for me outside of my door, I literally stayed in my room almost all day long to avoid going downstairs and remembering he wasn't there. I didn't even EAT in the house cause I couldn't bear the void that was there. So I sat in my room, looking at dogs and breeders. That was the only thing keeping me from crying.

I've lost two dogs now and I know that they can't be replaced and I would never try to replace either one of my dearly departed boys.

Next week, I will be getting a new Weim puppy from a breeder I found in New York, and because of my excitement, I had told my best friend and her boyfriend. Then in this snide disrespectful voice he told me how he thinks its too soon. Ugh I almost snapped! Who is he to judge soon or not soon?
Some people deal with loss differently. Personally, I feel incredibly lonely in this house without a dog, it doesn't mean I'm replacing him! We didn't at all expect to find a puppy so soon (we thought it would take months!) but we did and we're going to take it as a sign. Ugh, I didn't even try or want to reason with him cause it's none of his business but it really set me off. Now every time I talk about the pup, he just looks away. Who is he to judge me?!
Ugh @$$!

weimdawgs · Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 3:43 pm Post subject:

Don't worry about it. You are excited about your puppy...and that is o.k. We can't replace previous pets but there is nothing wrong with needing to fill that void that is left when they leave us. And every one is special to us. Timbit loves you and loved that you loved him. He would want you to share that with another dog.

And anyone of your "friends" that doesn't understand that...forget em.

RenaBella · Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 3:46 pm Post subject:

The death of my first dog really prepared me for this one.
After my first one died, I really didn't a dog until I realized that you can't replace the same but still have enough love for another.

Ugh, I wish some people just kept their mouth shut! If you have nothing nice to say, why say anything at all!

simis · Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 4:49 pm Post subject:

krisnkaipo · Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 4:54 pm Post subject:

I was so lost after my old boy died, that same afternoon I went to the local shelter. Just to be near dogs......my family and friends thought I was crazy and tried to tell me to wait.

I totally agree, that some people don't understand. I adopted Wilson 3 weeks after my old boy died and his antics over the subsequant months helped me sooo much!

It is never too soo, if you are ready that is all that matters!

Seespotrun · Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 5:38 pm Post subject:

Sometimes you just have to ask yourself, who's problem it really is and let it go. Obviously he is projecting his own issues onto you. I am sorry he is so insensitive. (((hug)))

allab · Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 6:27 pm Post subject:

luana80it · Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 1:43 am Post subject:

real friends should understand and support...real friends don't judge!

Deiota · Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 4:21 am Post subject:

hello!
when my older cocker Richie got really sick, I talked to my husband about this matter.
That was more like "when it happens, I know it will, sooner or later, what will we do? just keep Jesse with us? Because Jesse (the son of Richie) was not even a day alone, always got out and played together,,,, What is best for us? Us means me, hubby, my 3 yo kid Diana and Jesse and the cats. We debated and we just decided to get another dog. We've also decided to go for a bigger breed and we did a lot of research and we found the weims. Of course the breed is pretty family and people needed but so are we dog needed. Of course this breed needs a lot of exercise (and so do I that I'm pretty fat!!). Of course as soon as we decided to get one, we married with the arrangement of working out A LOT and wake up an hour earlier each day and all that (shoes and furniture damaged include). but what a hack? We decided to go for it!
Of course timing was pretty strange matter since we had a sick dog at home! We never even thought about putting Richie to sleep sooner because of a weim, what so ever. We decided to get on weim, when I was possible and desirable for us to get it!
What I mean is I'd never get a weim puppy along with Richie, would kill him (physical and psycho).
We contacted the breeders and we had to choices. To go for a weim that was, at the time 4 weeks old or wait till August to have him.
Days passed and Richie got worst and worst and making harder each day, since he didn't even get up to pee or poop. crying because it wasn't able to get up and meet us in another room or just go to the couch. I decided that was it! NO more pain for my beloved one!!!! We (specially me, cause he was my dog even before I got married) loved him TOO MUCH to see him like this! He was thin as I never imagine to see a dog! It was TOO painful!
I must say, specially the last month before I put him to sleep, what kept me alive was the believe and the mind occupied with researching and all that stuff. I was all day seeing and seeking and reading all about dogs and breeds and when I found weims I've read all about your forum and all over the net!
I got my mind busy not to go deep down to *poop*.
When I put my baby to sleep, I contacted the breeder and we bought Gandalf.
I have to admit that I woke up each day thinking about Richie and crying and grieving, but what made me feel better (stop crying for a while) was thinking and planing researching about Gandalf and all the accessories I should buy and all that!
It was pretty painfull to give up a friend (a baby) and never cross my mind to replace Richie by Gandalf and it will never happen! Two dogs completely different, raised in different circumstances and trained on the opposite way!
Richie was the most loving pet I'll ever have. It was so dependent on me, but not well trained (cesar's way, was too petted and loved).
With Gandalf, I train the dog, not love him too much. Don't get me wrong, I love Gandalf of course, but I don't show it! I'm the boss kind of way! I pet him as I want to!
One week after putting Richie to Sleep (I must say it was the WORST decision I've ever made and the best day of my life) I got Gandalf home. Since that day, everyday I keep loving Richie the way I always did, Unconditional LOVE) and I keep him near my (photos all over the place at home, and all), I'll do a tattoo of him soon (if not earlier, in September), I keep thinking of him a lot but I'm feeling better because I can keep pointing my love to another living that I ALSO LOVE, Gandalf.
Just when Richie died, I asked to remove everything related to him. Photos, leash and all that! But It was worthless since I had my daughter that reminded me of him each day a lot! Kept asking where's Richie? I said. just after I get home from the vet "Diana, Richie wont coming back. he was too old and went to sleep with Jesus."
But during days and even today (will be two months in 15th) she asks a lot about him! "I'm going to meet him tomorrow!".. So, a few days later, (three I guess) I decided to put everything back in place (including photos) and kind of making him his funeral. I got a beautiful box and put everything of him inside. That was pretty bad because was like the funeral, you know what I mean? Leashes, collars, favorite toys, vaccination book and all that stuff!
I must say that after that I'm able to talk about him knowing he's with me all the time, inside my heart! it no longer a tabu!
The weim will never replace your Timbit, but it helps you deal with the pain and keep living! I did!!! And do it every single day!
If you know you're ready to love another (keep loving Timbit always) go for it!!!!!!! It makes you smile a bit more each day!!!!
People also said pretty nasty things to me indeed I didn't care! I just wanted an happy family again! Diana smiling and jesse not feeling so DAMN alone (I guess he'd love a bit more loneliness nowadays... Gandalf can be a pain in the *bum* sometimes (puppy heheheh).
But, who really loved us supported our decision and all say it loud "Gandalf saved your family from going under..." That's what really matter!
GO FOR IT!!!! Timbit will love seeing you smile once again !!!! I'm sure Richie loves Gandalf for Loving me and making me love him already! He's running somewhere happy again! I'm sure!
Wish you the best luck with the puppy!
Deiota

megthered · Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 4:51 am Post subject:

We lost our 2 Dalmatians in February, within 2 weeks of each other. They were 14 and 15 years old but to lose them was very hard for the family. I started looking almost immediately for another dog because the house was too quiet and my family was moping around. They all thought it was too soon, but I knew I had to find another dog. I found Abby and it is the best thing I have ever done. Everyone loves her and she brings such joy into the house. She doesn't replace Max and Major but she has renewed a piece of our heart. I agree that Max and Major are very happy that their family is smiling again.

peppernaei · Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 8:30 am Post subject:

I feel your annoyance.

My little guy is 15 so a year and a half ago we started looking for a puppy. I know I would fall apart in a dog-less house since I've never not had a dog and my hubby is away often. I want my old man to be with us forever but I know that isn't possible and unfortunately his time will come. My grandmother got all defensive and said what's wrong with Zaphod, he's perfectly healthy. But the reality is that he has lost 6 of his 8 litter mates and 4 of them had a stroke or seizure and just died. Where would I be then? The 6 months waiting for Marvin was hard enough with a dog in the house.

I love both my boys -- for very different reasons. One will never replace the other but they will keep me busy and give me a reason to get out of the house.

Can't wait to meet your puppy!

RenaBella · Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 8:52 am Post subject:

Thanks for the support guys.
I knew you would understand!

No one is trying to replace Timbit, we are just trying to make this home a home again!

Deiota · Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 9:13 am Post subject:

I'm sure you will!!! I did!
Go for it!
When will you go meet your puppy? how old is he?
We want a lot of pictures!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! heheheh
Deiota

RenaBella · Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 9:23 am Post subject:

Deiota · Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 9:33 am Post subject:

I understand! I'm sure you want monday to arrive pretty soon! I did!
I spend a lot of time with research on the breed (this forum included) and all over the net. Chat with a lot of people owning weims and also seeing and choosing and buying the accessories and toys and all..
did you choose the name yet?
Deiota