*UPDATE* I don't know if I can do this anymore...

LunaBrown · Last edited by LunaBrown on Wed Oct 08, 2008 7:56 pm; edited 1 time in total

I just need to get this off my chest, hopefully I will feel better.

Gunther came to stay with us just over one week ago - tonight he goes to his new home. I am going to miss him, alot. But that is not what this is actually about...

Gunther is my third foster... each one of these three dogs' fate has ultimately been placed entirely in my hands. The rescue I work with is a very small group of people from our local weim club, and the gal who heads it up is a very busy woman with 3 kids, owning and running her boarding kennel, working as a personal trainer, the rescue group, and 4 or 5 dogs of her own to care for, show, etc. Oh and she's an AKC judge for hunting tests as well.

She is an awesome lady, but very hard to get a hold of at times... and with all three rescues, the final decision has been placed in my hands of which forever home they will go to... and after tonight I'll have been responsible for 2 home inspections.... It is all very overwhelming and sometimes I just feel like it shouldn't have to all be left up to me. A little tiny part of me wants to stop fostering because of this all... it just feels like too much responsibility, having the entire rest of a dogs life and it's happiness on hands.

Sad

krisnkaipo · Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 2:30 pm Post subject:

Well it sounds like you have done a great job! I suppose now you know if you sign up for another foster, it will be on you and you can't expect a lot (if any support). Maybe if you knew that going in it wouldn't be as stressful?

Not sure if that helps.....but that is a lot more than I have done and I think it is terrific!

Trene · Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 2:41 pm Post subject:

You'll feel better tomorrow. You know you're doing a great thing. Think you can recruit anyone to help you out???

freespiritmom · Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 2:45 pm Post subject:

Hasn't everything worked out so far with the other fosters?
It is obvious from your post that you care about the dogs and the homes that they are going into. I would suggest that you continue to foster because these dogs need people like you. Someone who cares about their future and the homes you put them. To me that is a valuable asset in a foster home. Yes it is a lot of responsibility but your judgment seems to be sound and most of the time intuition will kick in if something is not right. Please, for the dogs sake keep loving them and fostering them.

weimamama · Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 3:08 pm Post subject:

It IS a big responsibility, but so far, it seems like you've done a great job!

I have helped place 3 dogs outside of my group for another rescue and it is kinda scary t think the dog's fate is in your judgement... BUT I have made 3 new friends in the process that I still keep in touch with AND 3 dogs have gone to good homes and been saved!

What you're doing is AWESOME and IMPORTANT. Knowing that, I hope you will continue to foster and place Weimies, even without extra guidance and hay... you always have us to ask for suggestions! Very Happy

Seespotrun · Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 3:33 pm Post subject:

Just by our very lives, come responsibility. I feel most of us strive to do the very best by others as well as ourselves. You feel overwhelmed because you care so very much. This care is what will see you through. You just have to trust yourself, believe you are doing the best you can, and have confidence in your decisions. These dogs would not be placed in your safekeeping if they were not convinced that YOU are the VERY PERSON they can most rely on. You are giving these dogs an opportunity for a new life that might never had if it were not for you. We all admire you so much and know you can do this.

Christina · Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 3:47 pm Post subject:

I guess I kind of see it the other way and I hope this doesn't come across wrong. But don't YOU want the final decision? I know that when I foster, I sure do. I have seen some applications (for my mixed breed group) and have turned people down because I didn't think that they would be a good fit for my dog. I made the mistake one time of letting my foster go to someone who I regret and I like having the final say in where my foster dog is placed. I wouldn't want it any other way. And I want to see where the dog that I have brought into my family and treated as such is going to go so I would want to do the home inspection. I don't know, maybe I am to protective over my fosters or to controlling, but for my own piece of mind I HAVE to know they are going to the best place that they can go to and I like having the final say.

I hope that didn't come across mean or anything because that wasn't how I meant it to be at all. Just trying to let you see that what you are doing for your rescue is a GOOD thing. Keep up the good work, I know it is a lot, but in the end when you see your dog has made a great match with a forever family, I think it makes up for it.

mooks7014 · Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 6:45 pm Post subject:

Mindy, you are doing an awesome job ...You say that its stressful to think that you decide their future home etc BUT where would they be if you were not there in the first place to take care of them? You have to know that the homes you place them in are way better than what could have ended up happening to them if you were not there to love them.

I can only imagine the stress though that is being placed on you and your right its not fair at all, I guess you just need to decide if the amazing job you and your hubby are doing is worth the stress of the placement etc.

weimdawgs · Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 8:57 pm Post subject:

Mindy, you are doing a great job. Rescue is not a perfect science but we all do the best we can. You are doing great. I know the responsibility is stressful, but just think of what you have done for these three dogs. You are a good and caring person and are truly in this for the sake of the dogs. I wish more people were like you. Too many times people in rescue loose sight of why we are doing this...it has to be about the dogs..and you are all about the dogs.

Let us know how Gunther is doing.

clarkiek · Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 9:42 pm Post subject:

I really admire you for what you're doing for these dogs. I'm not ready yet, but I hope to be able to help out in the future. You will be the first person I come to for advice when I'm ready.

I can only imagine how hard it can be... just remember that you are making such a huge difference in the life of these dogs. If it wasn't for people like you who knows where they would be.

Phoenix1705 · Posted: Thu Oct 02, 2008 9:11 am Post subject:

You are doing a great job! I know how frustrating it can be. All of us in rescue do, lean on us for support and keep up the good work. It means so much to those animals. Smile

And the families you choose for them to live forever with. Hang in there!

LunaBrown · Posted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 7:55 pm Post subject:

I guess I just don't have it in me to not do it...

Gunther is coming back tonight. In fact, he should be here any minute.

A week and a half into his new home, he apparently was comfortable enough to show his true colors. Gunther I think has issues with being left alone, and this family felt very strongly about crating dogs "don't believe in it"... In the span of about an hour and a half today Gunther ripped curtains off the walls, demolished window molding and destroyed countless antiques, including eating part of a piece of antique furniture.... The guy is feeling pretty bad about giving up on Gunther but I'm not sure he had a choice... I tried to bring up getting a crate and he said no.

I had a feeling this guy hadn't done enough homework on the breed, but he seemed knowledgable about dogs, and sporting breeds in general having had quite a few in his life... plus they live on a 10 acre hobby farm, what weim wouldn't love that?! But ultimately I feel like we let Gunther down by not finding him the right home the first time.

I guess the good news is that Gunther will be happy enough to see us he will probably forgive me for my poor judgement....

weimdawgs · Posted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 8:14 pm Post subject:

You will find him the right person. Rescue is not a perfect science. He will be so happy to see you.

Phoenix1705 · Posted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 9:04 pm Post subject:

Oh rescue can be so complicated. Heck even when I think I have found the perfect foster home to place a dog in there are times I get bit in the arse. I am sure Gunther will be happy to see you! Luna will probably be pretty happy to see him too Wink

amazonstarlight · Posted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 9:22 pm Post subject:

Oh no. I'm so sorry that has happened. But as stated Rescue can be tricky sometimes. I remember this one senior chi that I helped foster and he went to about 4 different homes. He was the sweetest dog but each family turned out to not be the one. But by the 5th try we found the perfect ones. Keep your chin up. You are doing great!!!